Revised “Borowitz Report”
On June 29th liberal comedian and humorist, Andy Borowitz, who is widely known for his anti-conservative satirical blog titled “The Borowitz Report” published this article:
“Republicans: Trillions Could Be Cut from Budget if We Eliminate Empathy“ – Borowitz Report, 6/29/2011
For the first time in his career, in an apparent act of delirium brought on by a nasty case of reverse Democratosis, Borowitz first published a pro-conservative version of the above column.
The offending column was spotted immediately by Borowitz’s crack staff and taken down off the Internet faster than a speeding Washington DC rumor.
However alert reader, Ima Spy, had already fired off a tweeted copy of the column to right wing activist and publisher Andrew Breitbart.
Scooping Brietbart and for the first time ever … uhh, I mean second time ever… on the Internet is the one and only pro-conservative Andy Borowitz satire that exists, reproduced in its entirety… right here, right now!
Democrats: Trillions Could Be Added To Budget if We Promote Irresponsibility
– Logic And Reason Also on Chopping Block
Dateline: Washington DC, 7/1/2011 – Andy Borowitz (in delirium)
Today, in a surprise announcement from the House gymnasium floor next to Andrew Weiner’s old locker, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) proclaimed, “We could have all the money we want to pay off our massive debt if we just print it out of thin air”.
Pelosi triumphantly added, “It worked when I was Speaker and it’ll work now!”
When asked for comment, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) added, “Yeah, and not only that but we’ll impose punitive new taxes on the rich, too. That’ll teach ‘em for creating jobs outside of Nevada and getting rich off it!”
CNN’s Elliot Spitzer on his critically acclaimed show “In the Arena” praised Pelosi’s simple yet elegant solution for solving both the deficit and the debt problems before the looming August 2nd deadline for raising the debt ceiling. “Thank, Gawd!”, he said, “The country is saved!”
During a lively CNN panel discussion that followed it was decided George W. Bush and Republican obstructionism were to blame for everything.
White House Press Secretary, Jay Carney, said President Obama discussed Pelosi’s proposal with Congressional leaders in an afternoon Oval Office meeting but his position, like his views on gay marriage, is still evolving.
Standing just behind Carney at the White House press briefing, the President leaned toward his Chief of Staff, Bill Daley, and whispered, “What do the polls say about Pelosi today?”
Then, after a few awkward seconds, referring to Daley the President suddenly blurted out loud, “Hey, who are you? Whatever happened to Rahm Emanuel!?”